The 12 Dancing Princesses
by elisafyre
Summary: A weird take on the 12 Dancing Princesses folk tale, it's instead the 10 random assorted royal children. MATURE. Lots of sex scenes. Should be a fairly light story, not much angst.


Okay, so this isn't actually about princesses… and there aren't even 12 of them, but I randomly thought it would be funny to make a twist on my favorite folk tale, so here it is. 

WARNING: MATURE. There will be lots of sex scenes as the random couples get together.

I'm not going to spoil any couples, except to say that there will be GaaNaru. Basically, anything I write will have GaaNaru. I love Gaara. He's so cute.

Oh, and normal relationship rules don't apply. Gaara isn't related to Temari or Kankuro, in fact, you'll see that the 10 royal siblings are people who aren't usually related.

Anyway, here goes. Based on a folk tale.

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Once upon a time, there lived a boy with red hair and brilliant green eyes. He walked around his village, and was stared at by all of the girls there… and some of the boys, but he just didn't particularly care.

The girls wore short dresses, and made excuses to be around him when he did his chores, but he would glare at them when they got in his way, or stare blankly at them when they "accidentally" bent over, and just not particularly care that he wasn't acting the way they wanted him to act.

"Gaara," the girls would whine petulantly. "Why don't you want to date Emily, or Rose?"

"Because you're ugly," he'd answer coldly, then keep walking as they broke down and cried.

He wasn't particularly trying to be mean, but the girls were airheads, and the guys that hit on him were too, and he just wasn't interested in them. Gaara was naturally a cold, distant sort of person, and didn't get people a lot of the time.

Eventually, he got fed up with the whining girls around his village, but they got more and more blatant. One even went so far as to sneak into his bedroom at night. After he got in trouble for throwing her out the window, he left the village.

Gaara wandered with just his gourd on his back for a while, eventually coming to a neighboring kingdom. He walked around the town to get some bread and cheese when he saw a woman crying.

Gaara isn't like most protagonists. Gaara didn't really care about what the woman was upset about, but he was bored, so he figured he might as well see if there was someone he could beat up or rob.

"What's wrong," he asked.

The woman jumped, startled. "My boy just went into the palace to try to win the prize," she said, sniffling. "I'm worried he'll be killed."

"Prize?" Gaara asked, curious.

The woman looked at him suspiciously. "Don't tell me you haven't heard about the king?"

Gaara shook his head, and the woman walked away, shaking her head.

He shrugged. "Guess she doesn't like strangers," he thought to himself, then, turning, walked towards the palace.

He saw guards standing at the gate, so he walked up, expecting to be turned away.

The guards looked him up and down. "Oh now, go home boy," said the thin guard in a friendly way. "You don't want to die, do you?"

"Aw, c'mon now," said the pudgy guard, eyeing Gaara maliciously. "Let him in. I'm sure this genius can solve the mystery."

The thin man shrugged, waving Gaara through. "It's your funeral, lad."

Gaara stared at them both, then walked in, seeing a line formed ahead, and wondering what in the world he was doing.

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"What's the point, Jiraiya," Tsunade said huffily, reaching over to the servant waiting with her cup of sake. "You're just going to have to kill someone with this new proclamation."

Jiraiya shook his head, pounding his fist angrily into his throne, which was next to his queen's. "No, we're getting to the bottom of this. Unless…" he turned, "One of you wants to tell me what's going on?"

The ten children, ranging in ages from 15-23, all looked innocently at their father.

"Why, whatever could you mean?" drawled Itachi impertinently, receiving a glare from the man next to him, obviously his older brother.

"I mean," bellowed Jiraiya, causing some of the children to cower in their chairs, "Why do your slippers keep getting ripped and torn throughout the night?"

The group just shrugged and tried to look angelic under their father's scrutiny. Iruka, the oldest, was the obvious leader, and merely stared blankly at his father, looking bored with the whole process. Behind him was Itachi, smirking. Behind Itachi was Temari, who was whispering with Kankuro, her twin. Behind the twins was Sasuke, who was staring off into the distance while next to him, Ino and Sakura bickered, and finally, in a cluster, were Naruto, Kiba and Lee, with Lee gesturing wildly to Naruto and Kiba, not even paying attention to Jiraiya's growing impatience.

"Enough," Jiraiya exploded, turning to his main servant. "Let in the people wanting to solve the mystery."

The servant bowed, walking out of the room and returning with 10 people, again, a mixture of boys and girls. "Do I need to repeat my proclamation," asked Jiraiya angrily. Surprisingly, one person nodded (Gaara), which caused Tsunade to raise an eyebrow as she steadily drank down another bottle of sake.

Jiraiya inhaled deeply, looking as if he was about to shout again when he abruptly calmed down.

"Fine," he said. "Every night, my children go to bed, and every morning, their clothing and shoes are ripped and torn. I've had servants watch them, I've had other people try to figure out this mystery, and every time, they fall asleep. I'm sick of it."

The group nodded as if this were old news to them, except for one. "So?" called Gaara from the crowd.

"So," Jiraiya said, glaring at Gaara, "I've upped the bounty. Now, if you find out the mystery, you get a large monetary reward and your pick of my children to marry. I'm sure you'd like one of my girls," he said, gesturing to the lot. Gaara looked unimpressed, which caused Jiraiya to flush, continuing, "But, if you don't have an answer by the next morning, I'll have you executed."

The group of people appeared taken aback. "I still think that's harsh," Tsunade murmured between sips.

"Well I'm tired of not getting results," Jiraiya exclaimed, again losing patience. "Now, are you all still willing to try?"

The different people slowly nodded, no one leaving the room.

"Fine," Jiraiya said, exhaling. "We'll do this one at a time."

"You," he said, pointing to a boy, "What's your name?"

"Chouji," he replied, looking put on the spot.

"You're first, follow them and try to come up with the answer by tomorrow," he proclaimed, standing up from the throne and walking quickly out the door. Tsunade followed, mouthing, "Good luck!"

The group of 10 people stared at the 10 princes and princesses awkwardly, then Chouji shrugged and walked over to the 10 royal siblings. "So, what's up?" he asked. They laughed and walked out the door, and he followed.

The remaining nine watched them go, not envying Chouji, then followed the steward as he took them up to their various rooms to wait until the next morning.

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End file.
